The Journey From ‘Average’ to 'Someone People Listen To'

For most of my childhood, I carried one label everywhere I went: Average.

Not “brilliant,”

not “gifted,”

not “exceptional.”

Just… average.

My sister always scored higher.

My cousins were the “smart ones.”

My voice, ideas, likes, and dislikes were treated like background noise.

I remember sitting in the backseat during car rides, wanting to ask for my favorite song to be played — but stopping myself.

Not because I didn’t know what song I wanted.

But because I feared someone would laugh and say,“Your taste is so basic.”

The conditioning was subtle.

Not loud.

Not dramatic.

Just deeply internal.

Enough to teach me — “It’s better to stay quiet.”

My ‘Average’ Self

This label seeped into everything — especially my ability to imagine a future.

My sister dreamed of Dubai — new life, big purpose, independence. And I?

I couldn’t picture anything beyond being a housewife.

And I want to be clear here — the word “housewife” is not being used in a derogatory way.

Today, I am a housewife, and the purpose, grounding, identity and spark it has given me is something I hold with the deepest respect.

What I’m describing here is not the role itself — but the way I was conditioned to believe that it was the only life I was worthy of.

The limitation wasn’t in the life — it was in my permission to choose.

I didn’t express opinions.

I didn’t dream freely.

I didn’t trust my mind.

I played small so I wouldn’t be judged.

Average wasn’t just a description —It became my identity.

And identity shapes destiny — often silently.

The Turning Point

My life started shifting after marriage — and not in the fairy-tale way we’re taught to expect.

My husband wasn’t just supportive, he mirrored back a version of me that I had never seen before:

a woman who had something to say,

a woman who could think deeply,

a woman who deserved to take space.

He didn’t give me a voice.

He simply helped me see that I always had one.

And that was the crack in the wall —the beginning of dismantling decades of conditioning.

The Transformation

(How I Found My Voice)

I didn’t suddenly wake up confident.

It started small.

Uncomfortable.

Uneasy.

Shaky.

But consistent.

1. I began expressing myself — even when my voice trembled.

I would say things I usually kept silent in family conversations.

Not to argue.

Just to exist.

2. I started working with inner tools — to heal the ROOT, not just the symptoms.

• Art Journaling Therapy- Helped me see the stories and patterns running my emotions. It showed me how much of my fear was inherited, not chosen.

• Tarot- Gave language to emotions I didn’t know how to articulate. It helped me trust my intuition when logic had been suppressed.

• Theta Healing & Family Constellation Therapy Helped me break generational beliefs:

  “Good girls don’t disagree.”

  “Women should adjust.”

  “Your voice is not important.”

These tools didn’t add confidence —They uncovered the confidence that was buried beneath cultural programming.

3. I made purpose-based decisions.

Every choice became a statement:

“I choose myself — even when it scares me.”

Current Self & Credibility

(Why My Voice Matters Today)

Today, something extraordinary has shifted:

People don’t just listen.

They seek my perspective.

They pay to hear my guidance.

They trust me to hold their most vulnerable truths.

One of my clients came to me feeling deeply unhappy in her marriage — a pain she had carried for years in silence.

In that emptiness, she met someone with whom she felt seen, alive, understood.

But instead of empathy, she was judged.

Society had only one label for her: wrong.

Even the people closest to her couldn’t hold space for her truth.

Every voice around her said:

“Adjust.”

“Don’t think too much.”

“Sacrifice is your duty.”

So she did what many women do — she stayed quiet.

But inside, she was collapsing.

In our sessions, something different happened.

She felt:

• Seen — without needing to justify her pain.

• Respected — not rushed or told what she should do.

• Valid — her feelings were allowed to exist.

• Safe — enough to breathe, think, and finally hear herself.

I never once told her what choice to make.

And slowly, her voice returned.

Her clarity came back.

Her courage awakened.

She choses to leave the marriage — not out of rebellion, but out of self-honesty.

She chose her life.

And watching that — watching her rise — is the deepest validation of my voice.

Not because she followed me.

But because she finally followed herself.

No degree, no certificate, no fancy title can measure that kind of impact.

That is the power of being heard.

That is the power of reclaiming your voice.

Lessons For You

If you take anything from my story, let it be this:

• “Average” is not your truth. It’s a label others placed to make you small.

• Your voice is already inside you — it just needs space to breathe.

• Confidence grows from small, uncomfortable expressions — not sudden boldness.

• Your perspective will be medicine for someone — even if your surroundings don’t see it yet.

If This Story Felt Like Yours…

I share my raw stories, healing journeys, and inner reflections through my email community.

It’s where I speak the things I don’t always share on social media.

→ Join my private email list and step into the version of you who trusts her inner voice. (Think of it as sitting beside me, cup of chai, real conversation, no filters.)

With Love

Devika

Inner Voice Activator